Youth hunters and grades

[ltd2004]

Hello everyone. Just wanted to get some advice on the topic of youth hunters and school work. I have a 15 year old son who has a rifle mule deer and bull elk tag coming up. His grades are terrible and he knows if he doesn't bring them up hes not going hunting. These hunts will be his first and hes very excited to go. I think there is a lot to be learned from hunting, and being in the outdoors with family and friends and I don't want him to miss out. So my question is do you let your kids go hunting if they are failing in school?? Thanks for the advice

[rossislider]

Tough call! It would be terrible to waste a tag, but him missing out on this might be the one thing that makes him realize you are serious. I'd stick with your grades stand and if he doesn't make the grade, donate the tags.

[Antmo23]

Tough call! It would be terrible to waste a tag, but him missing out on this might be the one thing that makes him realize you are serious. I'd stick with your grades stand and if he doesn't make the grade, donate the tags.

+1. Stick to your guns, youth hunts are a privilege that must be earned.

[kazpilot25]

Very tough one. I would also stick to your guns with the grade thing. If he's really that excited, he'll get his butt into gear and get that school work together. At that age, there are very few things as important as getting good grades. Bad High School transcripts can limit what he can do in college, and in turn as a career. I know for engineering majors you can't have any high school math or science grades of worse than C.

[Scooter]

For me, it depends. I remember how I was at his age and school wasn't a big priority in my life. I was far from failing- but not doing as well as my parent's expected. When it came to Hunting and Fishing, THAT is where I wanted to be. I never had any disciplinary problems and I was always really respectful to my elders and authority figures. My mind just wasn't wired for book-learning. If my Dad or Mom would have taken Hunting and Fishing away from me- I sincerely doubt my grades would have improved, and it probably would have gotten worse.

 

I guess what I'm saying is that the outdoors is a lifestyle- something that goes beyond a mere "reward for good grades". Hunting is something he'll do for the rest of his life. He's 15, a sophomore in High School- be glad he's wanting to go spend time with you outside chasing elk rather than playing video games and God knows whatever else these days. I say, as long as poor grades are the only issue- go elk hunting. My opinion is that if he's a good kid behavior-wise but just doesn't perform well in school, I don't think taking away an elk hunt is the best idea.

 

Ultimately, you're the parent and you will do what you think is right... and I'm sure everyone will support you in your decision. We don't live your life everyday so your judgment call is yours alone to make based on the evidence.

[rossislider]

I'd also take into consideration what you've already told him. If you said no grades no hunting but then back down, you might have a hard time getting him to take you seriously next time.

[Sam]

He has plenty of time to bring up his grades. End of October for deer and end of November for elk. This is a longs way off. Contact the teachers, or go online and find out what he is missing. Make him do the work. He will be passing before you know it. This is my 20th year as an educator - first a teacher, now a counselor. High school is not that hard. My IB and AP kids have alot of work, but it does not take much effort to pass a regular level class. Give your son a chance - tell him to get his grades to passing or no hunts. Like I said, he has plenty of time.

[Pine Donkey]

This is an easy question in my eyes. There are three elements present when a child is being raised.

 

The first is basic necessities of life; food, water, shelter, clothing and healthy care. These are non negotiable and every child deserves them.

 

The second is expectations. These can be different within each family and are based on what that family places a value on. With my kids we put a high priority on grades, being drug free, and not having behavior issues. These items are important in our family, and were always places above the fun things. At the same time, things that may be important to others are not a focus in our household, such as keeping your room clean.

 

The third element is the the luxuries. These include hunting, driving a vehicle, cell phones, Internet, TV etc. All the things in this category are used as incentive/reward to ensure category 2 items are accomplished.

 

It comes down to what is important in your household. The last part of the equation is consistancey. If you said they need good grades to hunt, stuck to it. If you are not willing to stick to an ultimatum, don't give it...this is not Syria and you are not the President!

 

 

[couespatrol]

I have been in your shoes before. My oldest Daughter (who is now married) had an attitude issue with her Mother and I. So she was not allowed to go on her deer hunt when she was sixteen. She stayed at camp with her Mother while her younger brother hunted. She had been my hunting partner for many years and it killed both of us, but I stuck to my guns. The attitude problem was gone after that. She also was having problems with her grades her Junior year in High School due to laziness. She was on the Varsity softball team and they were one week away from the playoffs. I removed her from the team after speaking with her coach (she was the starting short stop) and gave her one week to catch up with her grades. Needless to say she brought her lower grades up to a B and was back on the team for the playoffs. I am a little hard on my children when it come to grades. They must not receive anything lower than a B grade or they are not allowed to play sports, hunt ect... Now if my child is really struggling in a certain subject that's a different story but if they are just being lazy, I will not budge. I have three other children who witnessed what happened to my oldest Daughter and know that I am serious. I have not had one problem with them yet!! They love hunting way too much to let grades or anything else get in the way. Good Luck!!!

[bigorange]

I'd also take into consideration what you've already told him. If you said no grades no hunting but then back down, you might have a hard time getting him to take you seriously next time.

 

Lots of good suggestions and comments here...I think Rossislider's is probably the most important one though. If you've already set the expectation (And it sounds like you have by saying that he knows if he doesn't bring them up he's not hunting) then it's important to stick to it. It will be tough to enforce, but well worth it in the long run.

 

Scooter (I almost missed that it was you without your Buckmark avatar! ) makes a good point too...if it's truly an issue of difficulty learning then taking away hunting may not help at all. If it's just due to not getting the work done, that's a different story.

 

Good luck...make your decision (whatever it is) and stick to it. Consistency is critical.

[azpredator@work]

I never include hunting and school work together.

 

Hunting to me is a sacred time of year to enjoy with my son and no matter what he has done previous to the hunt that time is to forget everything else and further develop the bond between him and myself.

 

I love to take away his playstation and I-pod

[PRDATR]

Some people just don't do well in school, happens. Not everybody is College Material. I never held that over my kids head. As a matter of fact, if they had a bad day at school I'd say, lets go fishing. I didn't hold grades over their heads. With some kids, the harder you make it for them the more the recede. It's better to be their place of refuge and build their confidence on what they do well because not all of them see the big picture.

Now sure we, as adults, know the value of an education but we all know someone who did not go past HS who found their niche then applied themselves and have succeeded.

Hug em and love em, because in the flip of a switch you could get a phone call that no parent should ever, ever, ever get.

[Az Edwin]

As a recent college grad, I've (somewhat) recently been in your son's shoes - it is not a fun place to be. In a perfect world, I would blame my parents and say that they had high expectations. Instead (in all my youth "wisdom") they were trying to encourage me to perform to the best of my ability - they knew what I was capable of and insisted that I perform at that level, not just once, but every time. Yes, this meant straight As through middle school and high school. It went as far as missing opening morning of a hunt just so that I could be in school on a Friday. You better believe their expectations... I mean encouragement... almost made me miss a few hunts.

 

Before my first doe hunt in the Kiabab in 8th grade, a week before the hunt, I had an attitude problem and promptly kicked a hole in my wall. I learned pretty quickly how to patch drywall (with help from Dad, of course).

 

Before my first November elk hunt I was spending too much time day-dreaming about bulls and what I would settle for (needless to say, I shot the first elk that I could). My English and chemistry classes suffered. Again, with a little help from Dad, we went in to school at 6:30am to meet with the teachers and figure out what I could do to improve my grades. (Chemistry it really was the teacher's fault! And though I swore Chemistry was my least favorite subject, I somehow ended up as a Biochem major.... go figure)

 

If you already set your expectations, keep 'em up. If your son really wants to go, he will find a way to meet your standards. Being in the woods is great father-son time, but so everything at home. Learning to patch drywall? Seeing Dad's professional side in those meetings? Reading the chemistry textbook together because neither of us understood it? Absolutely. All bonding times that I won't soon forget. But I also know that I will never forget using Dad's back as a rifle rest to shoot my doe. Or loading our packs with bricks and racing around the neighborhood to be in shape for elk hunting. Or driving to the ER because he fell and broke his arm on a deer hunt. I guess what I am trying to say is that just because you are in the woods together does not mean there is magic in the air that makes this bond happen... (OK - there is a little buzz and anticipation of the hunt. I guess that is magic)... but the entire process leading up to it is important too.

 

Oh - and once I got into college and was 2 states away with no one breathing "encouragement" down my neck, I learned to have my own set of expectations. Like father like son, I guess?

 

Long post. Hope you take something from it, especially since it is kind of from the other side.

[Adicted]

No way in my house. School is nunber one.

[resolute]

Grades mean IMO nothing in life but quite a bit when you are getting started in it! I see so many younger kids kids with terrible grades and while it is not important at the time, it is when salaries come up with a college education under their belt....while it might not be fair, education pays....money is not everything by any means but it does take some financial pressure off through hard work when you are younger by getting good grades. When I was a kid, college was not a choice, it was expected of me...and I am grateful to my parents for the doors it opened for me. There will be many opportunities to hunt....stick to your guns!